Conversion Dysphoria Blues by Reis Asher

Author:Reis Asher
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: queer, nonbinary, transgender, romance, mm, cyberpunk, cyborg
Publisher: Reis Asher
Published: 2022-04-26T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter Eleven

"I'm... free?" Tallis couldn't believe his luck as he was shepherded out of the police station under Nolan's watchful eye. "Not pending-further-investigation, but all-charges-dropped free?" He looked at Nolan, seeing him in a new light. "What did you do, Nolan?"

"Something that will no doubt have consequences down the line," Nolan offered. "Unless Holden considers me so far beneath him that he thinks I'm not a threat... In which case, he had no need to act at all. I'll get fucked for it someday, but it was the only way out."

"You blackmailed him?" Tallis waited until they were in the safety of Nolan's car to ask, but he was filled with the sudden urge to know the sordid details of Nolan's plot. Nolan didn't seem like the type to blackmail a cop. He'd been a cop, albeit briefly. He seemed to hold laws and rules in high esteem.

"Holden had it coming." Nolan stared straight ahead, seemingly avoiding Tallis's penetrating gaze. "It was payback. He forced me out of my career and outed me as trans to the entire department. He created a culture that froze me out, and threatened me when I tried to report him. In return, I offered to end his hopes of becoming Commissioner by suggesting I could take my story to the press. He had a change of heart about pinning a murder on you without a shred of material evidence. That's all."

"Someone else will go down for this crime," Tallis mused.

"I doubt it." Nolan seemed to crumple in on himself, like he'd expended all his energy putting on a mask he rarely wore. "That would require investigating a body convert death, and Holden doesn't give a fuck if people like us live or die."

"He really forced you out of your job for being trans? What a prick." Tallis sucked in a simulated breath through his teeth. "I guess he hauled me in because I'm a body convert, huh? I did get that vibe from him."

"It's exactly what I'd expect from him. At least he's predictable." Nolan seemed to relax a little, leaning back in his seat. Surrounded by fog, it felt like they were the only people in the world, and Tallis quite enjoyed the intimacy. It was a chance to get to know Nolan better, now that he was Tallis's captive audience.

"I don't understand you," Tallis blurted out. "At times like this, I can believe that you really care about body autonomy and the million other issues entwined with it. Why can't you extend that same kindness to yourself?"

"I don't know," Nolan confessed. "Stop trying to psychoanalyze me, okay? You called in a favor, and I didn't want to see you go down for a killing you clearly had no part in."

Tallis turned and met Nolan's gaze. "How do you know that? You barely know me."

"I know you well enough, kid. You're an idealist. People who see the best in others don't kill. They get killed." Nolan looked down at his hands.

"Is that what

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